A Testimony of God’s Healing and Glorious Redeeming Power
Our guest blogger today is Kendrick Ruel. Kendrick grew up in the Midwest and is the son of a pastor. Kendrick is a teacher, writer, and lover of nature and our great national parks. He many and varied interests.
At midnight I made a pilgrimage to Asbury, to what some are calling a revival. Fifteen years ago, here at Asbury University, the Spirit of God came upon me. I too had a revival. It started as an ordinary day, an ordinary chapel service, but an hour after the music had stopped and everyone was gone, I still remained weeping, my head in my hands. God spoke to me in the clearest voice, “Kendrick, I will make an everlasting covenant with you. I will never stop doing good things for you. I will give you a heart of worship, and you will never leave me.”
I had arrived months prior in a faith crisis. I was not sure I believed. I was broken, hurt, confused, trapped, and bound in chains of depression and hopelessness. I reached out with uncertainty and pleaded with God to prove himself to me. I looked outward for a sign. I looked to the sky. Little did I know I was the sign. The unmerited, undeserving, unworthy rescue of me would be that sign.
Strength, apart from my own, began to sustain me, as I took to heart James 1: to “consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds,” to “know the testing of your faith develops perseverance and perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything,” and to “ask God for wisdom who gives it freely to those in whom he doesn’t find fault.” I was faulty. I was broken, but through redemption, Jesus made me clean and pure in the sight of God, and so God began planting words of wisdom and strength in my life. And, perseverance I sought at all costs. God gave me the perseverance to fight gruesome, messy spiritual battles. I cried. I screamed. My wounds were raw.
Spirits of darkness had claimed me– but God said, “Kendrick is mine,” and together we waged war. God said, “Do not fear for the battle is already won,” and He showed me that my perseverance despite suffering would be my worship to him, a testament to his power.
I looked at my pain and the healing that had to take place and I said, “it’s too big.” God said, “greater than your pain is my strength I give you.”
That fateful day in chapel, God assured me He was with me. My faith crisis was over. God had dominion over my soul, and he set me on a path of spiritual healing. He orchestrated a team of people to surround me and help heal me. Then the devil struck back and stole my physical health devastatingly, but what the devil meant to separate me from God, drew me closer to God! However, the physical toll was heavy. I wasn’t sure I’d survive. God promised to heal me, but it wasn’t happening, and as I deteriorated and got weaker and sicker, I began to think God was calling me to healing in eternity. Internally, I was preparing to leave this world.
One day, at one of my weakest points, I passed out in the shower in a puddle of blood from my internal bleeding, only to wake up to the voice of God saying, “Thank you for being faithful. I will now heal you.” And so it came to pass in a matter of days that I was physically healed. An anonymous note sent to me read, “Ken, I see God in the midst of your hardships.” I knew at that moment my suffering was all being used for God’s glory, and my suffering was never really about me. It was about Him, His glory, His power. My life was a testimony. I had asked God a few years before for a sign. His sign had been with me all along– His presence, strength, and healing.
As I find myself back at Asbury, sitting in this wooden chapel seat, in this sacred place, fifteen years later, I can say all the chains that held me down are not only broken, but gone. The spirits of darkness who claimed me, now tremble and have no power. I’ve found healing, joy, hope, strength, courage, purpose. I am victorious in Christ. Those battles HAVE been won.
Life still has much to challenge me with. There is much growth still to be had, but I am not cast freely into the storms of life, tormented by the darkness, sinking under the waves. Now I am the clay in the Potter’s hand. Only He molds me. I am the sheep He went after. I have refuge in him. He says, ”you are mine,” and reminds me, “I will never stop doing good things for you… and you will never leave me.”
God heals the broken,
Redeems the hurt,
Strengthens the weak,
And gives purpose to all things.
Persevere and seek Him.
Glory to God Almighty.